Happy holidays to everyone but the family in the booth next to us at the restaurant tonight. If you’re that family, squint your eyes really tight when you see this picture of my family smiling and imagine that somewhere in that blurriness we’re all sticking our tongues out at you.
So maybe that sounds just a wee bit harsh. But this is the holidays and you tell the truth at Christmas. (I learned that from Love Actually-my favorite Christmas movie of all time. Does anyone else melt over and over again when Mark posterboards: *But for now, let me say, without hope or agenda, just because it’s Christmas and at Christmas you tell the truth. To me, you are perfect and my wasted heart will love you until you look like this* Gah! Love!)
I would have still wished you a merry Christmas even after your kid threw a menu into our booth three times. It was a little cute. And we all shared that little “haha silly baby” but you better make it stop moment.
But things changed when the lemon slice fell in my lap.
Closely followed by the place card.
Ugh then this:
The last straw. The last pile of stuff that entered our family zone. Yes, that is a half-eaten chicken nugget. And at this point I started to wonder if it was actually your almost-kid throwing things or one of you. The aim was getting better for sure.
So for you Family-of-4-(FOUR!!!)-Grown-ups-With-One-Baby and no manners to at least apologize for the giant mess you made at my table, you have left me but no choice. You are getting MY favorite nephew dog’s not-impressed face: