First day of….

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the gateway to the rest of their life and beyond and the culmination of babyhood FOREVER!!!!

At least that’s how the first day of kindergarten feels with all the pre-kindergarten activities we’ve had.  Popsicle playdates.  Meetings.  Go-see-the-classrooms.  Jumpstarts.  All before the real first day ever seemed like it was on the horizon.

And then too quickly the real first day came.

I made a special breakfast.

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And I packed a lunch.  (oh my goodness I need lunch ideas.  Thank goodness Stuffed Suitcases posts her ideas and so does Bon Apetit.)

I made sure my guys got a lot of love and squeezes before I let them go.

And sent them off into the big world. ALONE!!!!! (but together.  Thank goodness they’re together.)

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I barely cried.  (And not in front of them.  I think a few grown-ups might have seen me but I pretended it was the bright florescent lights from the school that were blinding my eyes.)

But my heart hurt a bit.  A ton.  My heart felt totally broken.  My house felt totally empty.

Kindergarten feels so big these days.

And so do they.

I hope we did this right, the hubby and I.  But don’t we all?  I think that’s what it is, that feeling, when you drop your kids off at school for the first time.  Are they ready?  Did we do this right?  Did we screw up and when will we find out?  Will they be okay?

WILL I BE OKAY????!

I think I’ll need the big hugs more than they do at pick up.

(And I’m now debating buying these shoes to make me feel better.  It is a monumental occasion after all and the Nordstrom catalog came when I was vulnerable and alone.)

Now to just make it to pick up on time.

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